A nearly superannuated terrorist and his aphrodisiac

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Who can fault a nearly superannuated terrorist with three wives, bent on destroying the infidel world, for needing a little aphrodisiac? It must have been hard to keep up for Osama Bin Laden with all the banging at home and blowing up outside.

According to an upcoming book by CNN’s Peter Bergen, a widely respected authority on Al Qaeda generally and Bin Laden particularly, the man’s preferred aphrodisiac was Avena syrup. We are told that Avena syrup is like natural Viagra made from wild oats, a large quantity of which was found in bin Laden’s compound at Abbottabad nearly Islamabad.

The book, “Manhunt: The Ten-Year Search for Bin Laden — from 9/11 to Abbottabad” is set for release on May 1 to coincide with the first anniversary of Bin Laden’s killing. According to the Washington Examiner, which has reported about the book, Bin Laden also dyed his hair using ‘Just For Men.’

I have it on authority that he never mixed up the two, meaning he did not consume ‘Just For Men’ and apply Avena to his beard. That would not have been pleasant to say the least, although being a natural sweetener the wives might have liked it on his beard.

What the disclosure means is that despite all the destructive grandiloquence of a blood-soaked religious war, these are ordinary horny men in search of a longer lasting hard-on. In Bin Laden’s defense (horrifying that one would ever use that expression), he had to also think about his afterlife where much greater pleasures awaited him going by his beliefs.

Bergen quotes a source as saying that Bin Laden was “vain”. I wonder whether one needed a source to conclude that unless his vanity was being discussed in the context of him dying his beard.

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About chutiumsulfate

South Asians can infer from my name what I am. View all posts by chutiumsulfate

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